Tag Archives: Life

Day 2 musings… – Columbus, OH – Connection 2011

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Day 2 – Columbus
This has been a very rich experience for me – every meeting, every interaction has been full of significance & meaning. As I’ve looked back on the day to try to “sum up,” I find that my words are inadequate to do justice to describe it & will probably leave . So, here I go with some musings…

From the messages –
• Jesus didn’t come to make bad people good; He came to make dead people alive.
• In the context of 1Kings 17 & Acts 20 – if/when you come across death, hug it – the life that is in you, by the power of the Holy Spirit, will bring life… For the same Spirit of God that raised Christ from the dead is alive in you, & gives life to you…(Romans 8:11)
• Bitterness, unforgiveness & resentment from past hurts are deadly, spreading poison, barrenness, disunity, & isolation – with the ultimate result a lack of fruitfulness & sensitivity. The only way these can be truly dealt with is with true humility & repentance.
o Isaiah 58:8,9; Isaiah 1:18,19; Matthew 11:28-30; John 7:37-39
• On the heels of repentance, God calls us to hunger & thirst for righteousness, & for the work of the Holy Spirit in, through, & around our lives
o To determine to repent, forgive, to be healed
o To see God work physical miracles by the power of the Holy Spirit
o To release to the church signs & wonders that point to Jesus Christ

I met for lunch with Jan von Wille, a friend & pastor from Germany – we spent several hours catching up over food & coffee – talking through the commonality of experience we have, albeit in different contexts. I came away feeling refreshed & encouraged, like 2 parts of my life that haven’t been ‘connected’ in a long time had come together. There’s a piece of me & my heart in Germany, & when I’m gone from there too long, I really feel it. Here’s to hopefully being there again this November for the Foursquare Deutschland pastorenfortbildung (Pastors training/strengthening/conference.)

In the afternoon, I had the privilege of being a part of a ‘task force’ that is specifically strategizing how to help the Foursquare church (local, division, district, etc.) find ways to reach, train, empower the next generation – over the next months, we’ll be offering up practical suggestions & steps to help do this, looking 3-5 years into the future. Good times.

The highlight of my day happened on accident – right after the task force meeting, I had to make a run for the facilities… unfortunately, there was no restroom. So, I had to make my way down a couple of escalators & search, (increasingly frantically, I might add. And BTW: that isn’t the highlight.)

In my search, I ran into my friend Jason D. – he is a dear friend that I haven’t seen in several years; his wife, Alyse, is theWeez’s namesake – they were a part of our church & youth group leadership team in Carson City, & they now live in South Carolina.

They’re at convention working in the ‘exhibit hall’ – serving as sponsors of a booth that is helping raise money for kids in Nepal – they’ve been active in missions in India, & have a heart for the kind of life & ministry that meets practical, tangible needs, as well as presents the gospel Good News in a way that makes sense to where people are.

I spent more time than they had, just listening, talking, & well, looking with disbelief at these two. More times than I can tell you, I’ve wanted nothing more than to be able to see these guys again… I feel very rich to have the relationships, friendships, & community that I do in Reno; I realized today that my heart has longed for the reconnection of the very old & dear friendship of these dear people.

Still can’t quite believe it. Feeling thankful. Alive. Joyful.

20 years ago… an anniversary…

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I woke up this morning a few minutes before my alarm… not surprising… except for the fact that the alarm was set for 4:50 so I could have enough time to get to to the church office to make coffee & read a little in advance of the guys showing up for Thursday morning prayer. The blurred numbers on the clock came into focus as I clumsily fixed my glasses onto my face… 4:34. It would be 4:34 today. Sigh.

My mind raced, mentally flipping through the calendar that exists in my head (isn’t there one in yours too?) finally coming to rest on today. Yesterday was June 16th, so that would make today… June 17. Hmm. It’s the 20th anniversary of the day my little brother, John Leavy Locke, went to be with Jesus early on a Sunday morning, Father’s Day, at 4:34 a.m.

I wrote a little bit about my brother not too long ago HERE. And as I sit here pondering the fact that its been 20 whole years since his death & ‘home-going,’ I take the time to revisit & rehearse the memories I hold most dear of my brother. They flicker through my brain like the rapidly turning pages of a picture book.

Folding newspapers together in the early morning as we prepared to go do our paper routes. Football. Soccer. Baseball. Hoops. What an athlete. He was the best of the 4 of us, by far. Rocking the mullet that shook Carson City on Day 1 of his tenure at Carson Middle School. I don’t know if it was the surf shorts, Jetson’s T-shirt, vintage Air Jordan’s or the infamous mullet that got him called to the office as a “distraction.” They hadn’t seen anyone like him before. His mix tapes. The rosy cheeks I see every time I look at thePasty Gangster. The smile. The temper. The baseball being thrown at me simply because I went in to wake him up. The grumpy comments because I was on the phone (again) too late with theBean. And a million others…

The picture at the left was his last school picture before he was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma. And yes, he was wearing MY red bow tie, the same one I’d used to complete my Pee-Wee Herman outfit… It’s not like this day is a dark, morbid day that I dress up in black & mope around. Not at all. Rather, its a day of remembrance. Prayer for my parents & brothers. Thanking God that we don’t grieve as those who have no hope. But a day where I still grieve. Laugh. Play his favorite songs on my mp3 player (he’d have loved the iPod & iTunes, & the ease at which mixes could be created. He was a Master mix-master.)

Father’s Day has been forever linked with Johnny since 6/17/1990. Can’t seem to think of one without the other; not that I want to think about death an inordinate amount, but hey, its inevitable, barring the preemptive Return of the King. Came across a great book about death, heaven, & processing the loss of loved ones called Everybody Wants to Go to Heaven, But Nobody Wants to Die. Great book, which I’d heartily recommend.

But I digress.

It’s a celebration, a day of remembrance. So join me:

Here’s to Johnny – & the profound influence he has had & continues to have on me & the man I hope to be.

a perspective shift…

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Today, I had to go to DMV to register the New Ex, acquired last week to replace the Old Ex, which had been totaled the weekend of 2/28. Now, going to DMV is not my idea of a good time, & the closing of the DMV Express has only served to make my reticence increase. However, today was as good of a day as I would get to go – not much on the calendar, & for all intents & purposes, a slow day in the life of scoey d.

Got my SMOG certification. Double checked to make sure the title was signed in all the right places. Gathered the VIN inspection paperwork. Got a copy of the “proof of insurance.” Took a deep breath & headed over to the DMV.

Seems like no matter how long its been between visits, DMV never changes. How many other places in life do you have to wait in line to get the opportunity to wait in line yet AGAIN to have your vehicular issues addressed? But I digress.

The line was long. Really long. Like for Indiana Jones @ Disneyland in the heart of the summer. People to my left & right decided it wasn’t worth the wait. But, I, resigned to the fact that this was My Day to register the New Ex, stepped boldly into the line. My special brain helped me count that there were only 77 people in front of me.

Sigh.

While I stood in line, I determined not to complain or grumble. I’d like to say it was because I am Such a Good & Mature Individual, but in reality, I was merely responding to the grumpy, frustrated, angry individuals around me; those that took the opportunity, time & time again, to voice their displeasure at having to wait. At bureaucracies in general & in specific. At the injustice of waking up to snow again, this far into Spring. & the list went on.

I spent 1 hour 15 minutes in that line. And when I finally arrived at the Info Desk, I hurriedly & prayerfully submitted all of my carefully prepared paperwork, hoping beyond hope that I had done all that was necessary to register the New Ex. My clerk was not easy to read. Her brow furrowed with concern. My mind & heart raced. She called in backup to review my documents. Again. And…

I was given a number. G485. Booyah! Now to wait for my turn.

Turns out, the next number called was G440. Meaning I was only 45 numbers (or so,) away from getting Dealt With by the DMV. Fortunately, I brought my books to study & multitask – prepping for next Sunday’s speech.

Only took another hour to get my number called. Have to say that after 2 hours, 15 minutes of waiting, I wasn’t in the best of moods, but I was ok. Ready to go back to work. And a bit exultant & giddy at finally Getting to the window.

And yet I was blown away by the tech that helped me.

She was absolutely exuding contentedness. She had a grin on her face that didn’t fit the circumstances surrounding us. I asked her how she was doing, how her day was.

She absolutely gushed:

I’m having a WONDERFUL day. It’s so beautiful. And I am so happy. I love that I have a job. I feel so fortunate to be able to do something that I enjoy, to help people. Life is SO good!

I was taken aback by my encounter; not expecting such a response, especially in the dreariness, rush, & general irritated atmosphere of the DMV. And yet…

I was touched. Reminded. Joy isn’t circumstantial. Sometimes what is necessary is a shift in perspective, to look at life through a different set of glasses. With hope.

Thanks Kathy.

Preparing for the Spring…

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Looking out across the valley, the last rays of sun leap out from behind the Sierras. Dark clouds streak the sky as a whistling wind rises & falls, reminding me that though this is the 1st official day of Spring, Winter hasn’t packed his bags & moved on. Yet.

The tease of the last few warm days have almost wiped away the memory of 2 feet of snow just 1 month ago. The ‘new-ness’ of life that comes with Spring definitely makes me think about change & transition. Wondering what new things are headed my way. What ‘new mercies of the LORD’ are coming towards me? Where am I going to be challenged to grow, develop, & lean into God in a new way…? To be taken beyond what I can see & know to the place of utter dependence. The place of “I don’t know about 2 weeks from now; though I’m fairly sure about today. And I know where to look tomorrow.” If that makes sense.

There is a temptation to stay where I am. In the familiar, the comfortable, the known. The places where my feet have marked a worn path, where I can almost walk with my eyes closed. A place where I feel competent. Strong. Secure.

To me, walking with God means being led. Not being the one in the drivers seat of my life, dictating what I’m doing & where I’ll be doing it; rather, looking for where it seems He’s at work in & mostly around me, & seeing how I can jump in in those spots. It means humility, a willingness to not “know” with certainty the plan for the next 3-5 months, let alone the next 3-5 years. To invite the Holy Spirit to shine a light into my life, even into the dark corners where we’ve hid the dirty laundry, that escapes even the most well-trained eye. But not His.

Practicing repentance. Realigning with God’s purpose, plan, & direction.

Laying down the right to be offended. To put aside (not deny, but not hold onto) hurt feelings. False accusations. A character that has been assassinated yet again, leaving the defense of me to the One who knows me best. Even if it means appearing weak.

The last several months, I’ve been reminded that I need to be planting God’s Word in my life, heart, mind, & spirit. To read, listen to, & meditate upon the Bible. To get it ‘in me,’ so that it can bring about the life God desires for me, & to provide fodder for the Holy Spirit to apply as the Spirit sees fit.

Entering Spring, I reapply myself to the Process, to say “Yes,” to what God has for me & mine in this next period of my life. That His purposes, His mission would be my priority. That love for others would overflow in my life; that I would grow in knowledge & discernment, to know what is REALLY important; to be fruitful in Christ-likeness, living pure & holy in His sight, bringing praise & glory to Him.

Yep. Here comes the Spring. And I’m looking for the new.

looking back on a Snow Day…

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Woke up this morning to the joyous celebration that always accompanies a ‘Snow Day” – meaning the promised snowfall had not fallen short of expectations, 7 the prayers of my 3 children (& kids all over Reno,) had been answered. Stayed in bed for a few extra minutes; seemed the right thing to do, considering the fact that the need to rush off to school as Carpool Dad had been removed. Smelled the coffee. Ah.

Did what I always do when its snowing – check the weather report at weather.gov (like Duffy told me to,) to see how bad the storm would be, & how long it would stick around. Good news… confirmed by the evidence from the windows. Spriling snow, but not much. Which meant… shoveling the driveway.

Dressed for success & made my way to the driveway – don’t know exactly why I’m drawn to shoveling snow, but it feels absolutely like the right thing to do – clear a path to the cars, clear the cars, scape the windows. Great satisfaction at completion, in spite of the input my neighbor gave letting me know it was going to snow all day long. (BTW: it didn’t. Booyah.)

Took IDoey to the dentist, braving the most dangerous & difficult thing about the snow: drivers. Almost got taken out a couple of times by a black Hummer driving in the middle of the 4-lane road. Rewarded ourselves with chocky donuts, & navigated our way back up to the house.

Got a call saying that in spite of the snow & cancellation of school, IDoey’s dress rehearsal for White Christmas was still happening, giving further credence to the saying, “the show must go on.” So we piled into the car & navigated the streets again. Worked out, (Yes, it was a kettlebell day. I’m feeling the results of the last 3 weeks. Good results. Love it.)

Home. Chili-beef soup, made extra spicy with the brown Tabasco, aka Chipotle... And cornbread. Little rotwein. MNF. Now just waiting for dress rehearsal to be done so the day can end.

Reminiscing with theBean. This turned out to be a great day, snow & all. Life is good.

It’s Thursday again, & I’m titling my posts after the days of the week again…

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The longer I live, the more I think that the whole “coloring inside the lines” thing is over-rated. Some of the best pictures I ever did didn’t even have clear lines to color inside. Seems like life is a lot like that. Either the lines are in all the wrong places for where I think I’m supposed to color, or there’s not any lines to give a reference point.

Oh well… pass the Violet & let’s have at it.

I’ve got a spasm in my back, 1/2 way up on the left, which is turning out to be a big knot most of the time… The good Dr. G worked me over as if there were no ramifications for doing so, & then recommended a massage; esp. in light of the fact that next week is convention… er… Connection & the odds are decent that I’ll be sitting in meetings & sessions & other things quite a bit. Any recommendations on a masseuse? I’ve gone one place & decided not to go back there…

Been listening to Green Day’s newest. Interesting. Never been much of a fan, but based upon a recommendation, I thought I’d give it a spin (figuratively…) I’ve been going back & forth between it & NO LINE, & finding the combo to be very, very thought provoking…

taxes…

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NOTE: This is not a rant addressing the Constitutionality or lack thereof of the IRS, &/or any federal/state taxing entity. That’s a topic for the politicians to rant about in this wonderful election year that we’re only 9 months away from being done with. Barring another Florida. But I digress…

Every year, as soon as January 1 rolls around, the 1st thing I want to accomplish is to finish my taxes for the now dead & gone year. Granted, 1/1 is rather early to start on a return, so I usually aim to make myself wait until at least 1/15 before I start the deed in earnest. I don’t like taxes, so I want to get them done as soon as possible.

Another thing – because my job is what it is, there are myriad special tax-laws, forms, & ways of calculating the #’s that apply only to me… it’s led to me being semi-well informed on taxes, tax-law, self-employment taxes, housing allowances, & other things tax… so I do them myself.

There’s usually some institution (mortgage company, school, etc) that neglects to send me my info in a timely fashion – timely meaning sending it to me when I want it. It has nothing to do with meeting their 1/31 deadline to have the info out. Timely is my timely.

So, it brings me great joy to know that all of the documents I now need for my taxes to be done correctly, legally, etc can be accessed online.

And my taxes are done.

For Brint…

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It’s dedicated to Brint, as I believe that he may be the one to most appreciate it. Howevuh, for those of us that need a little lift: here’s to you, sci-fi fans of the multiverse…

Food & relationship

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One of the things that was a highlight of the trip was the food – the Bean took quite a few pictures to digitally capture many of the culinary masterpieces we had the good fortune of devouring.
Simply put, the presentation, color, & texture made the food look almost too pretty to eat. Almost, says I, but not quite. We found a way – though there really wasn’t any sort of “Thanksgiving ribs-fest, I’m stuffed to the gills” type of feeling. I think it was because just about every meal took such a long time to finish – the slower we ate, the full-er we felt; therefore, the less beautiful food that was consumed.


Even the cappuccino & coffee drinks looked incredible – there was even chocolate powder on top of the cappuccino’s foam that had been dispensed in the shape of a heart. Had to drink them somewhat quickly, as the temperature of the drinks was significantly lower than I am used to.

The best part about the food was that it was consumed in the context of spending time with others – the highlight of Roma for me were the leisurely meal times that the Bean & I sat across from each other, talking both about the deep things of life & the simple observations that the trip brought. Something that is easy to miss was reawoken by the time, energy, & focus given to each other – a great gift for any relationship, but especially if your love language is quality time.


Developing relationship with people seems to happen better over food – there is a principle of fellowship that is released when we spend time with others, eating. Maybe its because we’re forced to listen because our mouths are full; perhaps its because eating is something that we have in common with every other human being in the world, regardless of our country or culture of origin. The food & customs of each are sure to be different, but also provide a source of bonding. My friend Johannes, featured below in the purple shirt absolutely loves to take us to restaurants that don’t just serve authentic German food, but that serve food for real Frankfurters. He gets a special joy out of watching Americans try to choke down “Handkase mit musik” which is basically the world’s most pungeant cheese, with a hard shell on it from marinating in vinegar, smothered with onions. (the “mit musik” means that the cheese/onion/vinegar combo causes flatulence.) The cheese tastes worse than anything I have previously tasted in my life; Johannes laughed his head off, & our friendship deepened.

Something happens when we eat together that is unique. The meals & the people interactions are always the highlight of our time in Germany – & have resulted in life-long friendships starting & growing. And it doesn’t hurt that Germany makes the world’s greatest Hefeweizen – something that I’ve never found the equal of here in the States. More on the Hefe…

I’m inspired to eat with others more – & to make my meals something that aren’t just consumed as fast as possible on-the-way-to-somewhere. Rather, I want to utilize the time to invest in the lives of the people that God has put in my life. Especially the Bean.