Tag Archives: Marriage

The Caucuses – Day #12 – Friends, food, & digging into challenging Scriptures

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Another hot day… & it lingers in a way we don’t get at home, never really reaching a cooling down. Our hotel room is on the 5th floor & there’s one elevator so we’ve been taking the stairs to the 1st floor conference room or the ground floor lobby/dining area. The top couple floors of the stairwell are a sauna & its a lot of fun to walk down, if nothing else than to get a modicum of relief by the time you hit the 2nd floor.

During breaks & at lunch we’ve been heading out into the neighborhood for a quick mental health break… but also to see this section of the city & walking among the crowds of people. Businessmen, shoppers, beggars. 20-somethings dressed the same as you’d see someone at home dressed; 50-somethings in traditional clothes. This city is a combination of old & new, traditional & cutting edge, east & west.

Lunch yesterday we were invited to a local place known for great Georgian cuisine. A group of us sampled dish after dish as we talked about life, family, food, & the like. Some of the food/drink I have only the vaguest idea what it was… a green carbonated “health” drink that turned out to be tarragon water. Khachapuri, a cheesy bread that looks like: a pizza-like dish (no red sauce; just crust & a lightly salty cheese filling &/or topping, cut into the familiar pizza-style triangles, or shaped like a Venetian gondola with cheese filling & a raw-ish (barely cooked) egg sunny side up. Khinkali, a dumpling filled with meats & spices & a broth that your supposed to slurp out of the side of the dumpling as you hold it by the ‘handle’ at the top. Fresh vegetables, cheeses, bread samplers, spiced sausage wrapped in a tortilla, & deliciously charred lamb/beef skewers, minus the skewers. A real feast.

Our DLT times have been good, with lots of often ‘spirited’ interactions. Topics yesterday included Family, Marriage, Husbands & Wives. There are several countries & cultures represented – all with their own viewpoints & interpretations of the familiar Scriptures & instructions in Ephesians 5 on family/family relationships given by the Apostle Paul. Everyone here is a pastor/church leader… & navigating the theology & understandings around the often emotionally charged topics has been an exercise in walking (& talking) carefully. Some are, very intensely, solid in their belief they know exactly what these Scriptures mean & how they apply them. Very cut & dried. “Scripture says clearly” which (in my experience, & cemented in my thinking today) is usually an indicator of a core position of both identity & theology for the individual… a lens through which they see & interpret & interact with the rest of the world, without the need or desire for any wiggle room. Jesus addresses this in the Sermon on the Mount – talking about “you’ve heard it said…” & then giving “but I say to you.”

I guess what I’m trying to say is this – the intention of God’s law & commands – & our understanding of Him & having relationship with Him – centers on Him creating the ways & means for us to be able to come to Him, on His terms. In a broken world with relationships ruled by chaos, selfishness, & the like, Jesus offers a way of mutual submission, gentleness, order & care rooted in His own, lived out example. The husband is called the “head” of the woman – not to lord authority over her & dominate her, but to provide a space of love, care, & protection where she can thrive & become all God has for her – based in the example given by the Lord – love your wife like Christ loves the Church, giving Himself up for her, laying down His life for her. Calling the instruction given for a wife to submit to her own husband, as she does to Christ – isn’t a punishment or a justly deserved consequence because “Eve didn’t listen to her husband, so she (& all the other subsequent women) need to be “kept in line” by a strong husband & his strong & sure (rigid? inflexible? letter of the law that kills?) interpretation of Scriptures.

Lots of prayers for grace & gentleness & (hopefully) clear & precise language in my communications the last couple days… asking God to help me manage & moderate my own expressions, non-verbals, & tone… when you don’t understand someone’s language & are relying only on a translation (or a 2nd hand translation where you talk through a translator who then is translated into the target language) its easy to misunderstand a person, esp. when they are from a totally different culture & people group & the norms aren’t the same as what you’re used to.

1 more day – 4 more sessions. Looking forward to our times together today…

Thank you for your prayers & support & encouragement.

Central Asia – The Blur of Days #7-9 – DLT

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Monday around noon we loaded up the family van & headed to the Be Fine Hotel on the other side of the city… a decent 10 mile trek through midday traffic in a bustling city of 4 million. How long could it take?

2 hours. At least 2 hours. Stop & go traffic. Vehicles playing their own versions of a game resembling Frogger, Tetris, & tag. More close calls than I care to revisit. No accidents seen. Angels on overtime.

Settled into our hotel room with a brief respite before the opening sessions of DLT kicked off. This particular conference is Module 2 of the DLT material, “Marriage & Family” & the topics we covered over the last 3 days include – Discipleship & Leadership Training within the context of:

  • Family – what is it & what are God’s purposes for the family unit? How does God work with family to teach people about Himself & His character & life?
  • Marriage – who gets to define what is the purpose of marriage? What does Scripture have to say about marriage? How do you navigate through cultural & social norms for marriage when they are in conflict with Scripture? (For example, many cultures in Asia embrace the male dominated, female subservient role within marriage, where the husband is the absolute authority & ruler in the relationship, & the wife’s role is to serve the husband (& often the extended family of both sides – hers & her husbands), have children (esp. boys), often being treated more as a servant &/or possession than a partner. In Christ, marriage can be seen elevated to a loving partnership where both parties submit to one another out of reverence for Christ; where the husband takes on the servant leadership role of headship of the wife, laying down his life for her like Christ laid down His life for the church; where the wife willingly submits to her own husband (think 2 cars merging into 1 lane to avoid a crash) – instead of insisting on forcing her way ahead of her husband or into a domineering role over him, she comes alongside & walks with him.
  • the significant roles of the fathers & mothers in establishing & maintaining the identity & direction of the children; the role of spiritual fathers & mothers in providing care, leadership, encouragement, & mentorship in the pursuit of relationship with Christ, esp. for people who haven’t had the support/care of natural parents, or whose parents didn’t know Christ/didn’t teach them about life with Him.
  • the role of the single (unmarried) persons; the ultimate goal for all people for all life isn’t marriage – & singles aren’t to be pitied & treated as pariahs until the day when they could somehow (gasp!) enter into normal life & be married. There is a huge value on the individual in Christ.
  • Balancing family, life, work etc – living in rhythm & rest; embracing the Sabbath as a normative part of life for the Christian disciple;
  • As I’m doing this off the top of my head, I’m forgetting a couple of sections…

As I’m typing this, it is now Wednesday at 6 a.m. We’ll be doing our last sessions of this Central Asian DLT in about 4 hours – over the last 3 days, our schedule has included at least two 3-hour sessions to present the material through a translator, initiate & moderate discussions around the 5 or 6 tables where the participants are scattered 4-6 deep; provide opportunities for meaningful feedback from the participants.

The drain on the brain is real – trying to teach & “facilitate” while attempting to think in simple, easily translatable concepts, avoiding Americanisms & idioms that we rely on for our daily communication without even knowing it. Think:

  • Watching paint dry.
  • Actions speak louder than words.
  • Hang in there.
  • The last straw.

All of these were used this week. Native English (or at least Northern NV Americans) would easily pick up what is being said with each of these phrases… but for the Central Asian for whom English (not American, but English – there is a HUGE difference) is a 3rd or 4th language, it is tough & requires stopping, giving an explanation, re-translations, etc. Add to the mix the nuanced & emotionally charged topics of marriage & family which are often fraught with disappointment, frustrations, & unmet expectations, & you’ve got quite the brain drain.

Add to that 3 meals a day – social & conversational events that require patience, a sense of humor, & more than a few attempts to even get a cursory understanding of the simplest of interactions & you see why & how a person gets fried.

We’re 12 hours ahead of home, which makes for easy math, but not great sleep. We’ve been able to head to bed around 10 each night, often passing out quickly only to reawaken in the middle of the night (I’ve seen the clock turn from 2 to 3 a.m. every night so far) & struggle to get back to sleep before the morning responsibilities kicked in.

After our last session & receiving communion together today, we’ll be packing our bags & (eventually) heading to the airport where we’ll catch a flight to our next destination in the Caucasus where the Russian-language DLT starts tomorrow (Thursday for us – at 2 p.m.) It will wrap up Saturday evening with communion & celebration.

We’re looking forward to reconnecting with our dear friends who are the overseers for the Eurasian Bible School – people we got to know last year who are meeting us there for the DLT. From what we’ve been told, there are participants coming from several surrounding countries – all who have committed to the 18-month DLT process as they explore formalizing their personal & their churches relationships with Foursquare & either joining or, more often, beginning the process of forming the Foursquare Church in their country of origin. It’s a long & relational process – & I have to say – people are people.

Thank you for your prayers & support – they are helping us through some challenging times & we are seeing God doing some really cool things in healing marriages, providing hope & thoughts of a different & preferable future, in addition to growing as disciples of Christ. After all, what good is our faith if it doesn’t have a transformational effect on us in every area of life, especially in our interpersonal interactions with loved ones & family – both family of origin & chosen.

CA: Day #8

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Last full day of DLT began with breakfast & discussion-heavy presentations. I love the discussion elements because we got to hear from people with a varied background what it might look like to them to put their faith into practice; it allows you to get beyond the acquisition of information into the practical application of a Christ-following life.

For example – as a part of the marriage & relationships module of DLT, we spent a chunk of time processing through polygamy… something that is a fairly common (& accepted) practice in many parts of Central Asia – & especially among Muslims. In a local church context, Christ-followers need to have an understanding & consistent Biblical ethic on navigating polygamy when it involves people in it coming to Christ. It’s not like a newly-saved individual with their wives can be instructed, “just keep wife #1 & divorce the rest.” To do so could be catastrophic for those women cast off in the name of fidelity to the Christian faith, as a divorced woman in many of these cultures would have next to no rights, no viable means of support or living, & most likely no opportunities for remarriage. So what might be suggested is something like “2nd generation monogamy;” where the next generations of new Christians would be taught Scriptural principles around marriage (1 husband/1 wife) while the 1st generation family learns to live in a new reality following Jesus with remnants & reminders of ‘the old ways.’ Definitely a lot to think about.. & lots of fascinating discussions.

Our team was told we would have a late night as we were volunteered by our hosts to minister to our DLT attendees in prophetic prayer starting at 9 p.m. So theBean & I took advantage of our afternoon break (1:30-3 p.m.) to rest, read, & recharge. And by that I mean we crashed hard. HARD. I don’t know what it was that woke me up, but when I looked at my watch, it was 3:05 & we were late to the session. I didn’t have a clue WHO I was, let alone WHERE I was, & it took about 20 minutes for my brain to adequately reset to the point that I could gainfully participate in the happenings in our session.

Haven’t been sleeping great… waking up between 5-6 a.m.& not able to go back to sleep which is ok unless you are going to bed late… which we are. Naps have been helpful but today really hit me with a hammer.

Navigated the last afternoon session & had an opportunity to talk with/pray with a team of people from the northern part of the country: G, O, V, & S. After 20 years of pastoring in the same city/area, they are in the process of trying to decide what their next phase of life & ministry will be, as they lean towards starting a new church a few miles down the road. People are people… so similar to the plans, hopes & dreams you might hear about at home, with added intrigue & the challenges that come specifically targeted at each of us.

After dinner, (7-9 p.m.)  we decided to rest some more in preparation for our late night… I lightly napped & read (I’m on my 3rd paperback) & eventually got up & got ready about 8:45 p.m. Felt a little like burnt toast, but we took the time to pray for energy & to thank God in advance for giving us what we’d need over the next couple of hours as we prayed for our new friends from a variety of CA countries.

There was a brief message/encouragement, & then our team was divided into 4 groups of 2 or 3 & sent to the 4 corners of the room. The DLT attendees were instructed to get together with the people from their city/church/region &/or country & identify different things that they wanted to receive prayer for: things going well; points of need; areas of struggle; etc. Some instrumental worship music was put on & people began to make their way to the corners of the room. It wasn’t like they were standing in lines; they were encouraged to talk & pray with each other in the middle of the room, & then to make their way to a corner for prayer when the opportunity presented itself.

Got to partner with theBean & Will – pastor from Atascadero – as wave after wave of people came for prayer. Some readily identified specific requests, like “We need a place to meet that is authorized by the government,” or “We need workers to help us in our mission,” or “We need to know what we’re supposed to do next.” Others left it intentionally vague & asked us just to pray “as the Holy Spirit leads.”

Really cool how in every situation, specific things came to mind to pray for; sometimes related to the request; other times out of left field. The one that stood out to me the most was a group of 5 from the northeast of the country. They are all 30-something & are all 1st generation Christians. They don’t have elders in the faith in their area to look up to, to be discipled by, to learn from. They have the Bible & each other (as well as the confederation of other pastors spread waaay out in this vast land.) They prayed for spiritual parents: fathers & mothers in the faith to come alongside to help them grow in knowledge, experience, & perspective. They want so desperately to do well in making disciples & to not mar people with their unnecessary mistakes caused by inexperience &/or lack of good Bible teaching/practice.

As I listened to them talk, I was overwhelmed with emotion – they see themselves as inadequate & know all the things they DON’T have & WISH they did. They feel alone & desperate for help – for divine intervention in the form of people, elders, to stand alongside them & encourage them in the Way of Jesus. And I had a deep sense (& prayed about) God’s great love & joy that He has for these people; for their pure hearts, simple obedience, & active fatih… a faith that doesn’t wait until they know ALL there is to know on a topic before they start living it out. I felt like I could see in the spirit realm & when I looked at them, I saw warriors (not in a natural conflict/war kind of way,) but warriors who are battle tested in spiritual things. I saw God shaping them & making them to be the very thing they were praying for in there desperation… spiritual fathers & mothers. And though they may be 1st generation Christians, the first ones in their area of CA, they have what they need because they continue to see the One who will supply all their needs according to His provision.

So sweet to hear their prayers & their thanks at being able to be a part of the DLT: to learn from others & to grow in things of God that they would be able to do the same for others in their own place.

I was deeply moved & affected by this group, & I will continue to be praying for them long after we get home.

Finally wrapped up our prayer times around 11:30 – thankful for translation team – & made our way back to our room. We were pretty wired still (pretty normal for nights like this,) so we sat up & (finally) got the WiFi to work well enough to watch a show on Amazon & nurse a CA Coke Zero. Eventually nodded off around 1:30 or so (according to the FitBit) & (unfortunately) woke up at 5:30 again.

We’ll be leaving the hotel & headed to the airport around 2 a.m. tonight (8/9 – & technically Friday); then we have a flight & a bus/train ride to get to our Julia’s home in Germany. It might be a minute before I get to catch up on Day #9 & #10 – but – thank you for your continued prayers. Please join me in praying for these precious people of CA… & give thanks for the God who hears & responds… the same God who HEARS you & RESPONDS to you in your needs as well.

Deutschland #9 & #10

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#9 – My good friend Eddy picked me up from Alex and Linda’s with his car full of kids… really fun to see how much they’ve grown, & also to meet their new addition: the adorable & precocious Kira. When we arrived at their home, Laura, Eddy’s wife was preparing a round of gluten-free pizzas to go along with the Dueck’s weekly/Friday “Pizza & A Movie Night.” The pizzas including pepperoni, peppers & mushrooms, hawaiian, & regular cheese. Laura can cook.

While the kids watched “Ice Age,” (which I haven’t seen. Any of them. Not because I hate movies. Or animation. Just because, man. Just because,) Eddy, Laura & I caught up on the happenings of the last couple of years since Eddy left as pastor of TPLF. Most of it I’d already heard, as Eddy & I Skype & pray with each other, but it was great to hear from Laura as well. The Dueck’s are doing great, & it makes my heart happy to see that even in a very trying, difficult situation, they are coming through it with grace & their genuine smiles intact. Also got to meet Reinhard at dinner, a Spanish/German musician from Colombia. We got lost in the labyrinth of musical inspiration & favorite guitarists (started with Jimi & Jimmy, headed to Roland Orzabal, & Clapton, then meandered around through the maze that is modern music. A really fun time that I thoroughly enjoyed.

FRA-bridge-nite800-1Too quickly it ended & Eddy dropped me off to meet Alex & Linda – though I’ve been staying at the house, we haven’t had a ton of time together, so Friday night on the town with the Kriegers it was. They wanted to take me to a favorite place of theirs. From the outside, it looks like any of the entrances to the myriad flats lining the Main River.  A knock on the door (along with the appropriate password/reservation) revealed a 20’s style speakeasy. No pictures are allowed of the inside, but suffice it to say, it was a memorable & tasty experience.

We walked from there to a local pub to hang out & talk – the time flew by as we wrestled through all sorts of meaning of life (& also totally fun) questions, thoughts, & musings. They are musers, like me. Which makes for good talks. Called an Uber private taxi around 1:30 a.m. & went straight to bed & crashed hard.

#10 – Woke up early-ish for breakfast, then packed up a borrowed backpack (so I didn’t have to take the monster bag on my travels) & headed to the train station for my hour long trip to Mainz, the city where Jan, the Foursquare Deutschland national leader & pastor of EnChristo Gemeinde (In Christ Fellowship) is based. Got to see my first “pro-Palestine, death to Israel,” demonstration outside the train station. I will come back to that in a later blog.

Jan picked me up, & we walked to a Lebanese restaurant for Schawarma, & then to a local cafe for espresso. We spent several hours in the afternoon sitting in an open square next to a huge church (St. Martin’s I think) talking about life, & family, & the like. It’s one of many things I appreciate about Jan – when we talk, he starts with the important stuff, (his phrase is “let’s talk like men!”) which to him seems to be focus on the things that are eternal, personal, & precious. Church talk happens too, but it isn’t at the forefront & it surely doesn’t define us.

Spent the last part of the evening outside on the veranda with Jan & Susanna (Jan’s wife) talking more about family, husband/wife relationships & parenting. Sat in the dark with a beautiful lamp throwing the only light. Finally, around 11, everyone was tired, so I headed to my room & crashed hard.

Thank you for your prayers – blessings to you.

 

Deutschland #8… a Thursday

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DAY 7, Part Deux –

I left the house around 12:15 p.m. to head over to the home of Levent & Ines  via the Ubahn. One of the most confusing things about using the transit system isn’t figuring out the trains – instead, its deciding which of the 4 exits leaving the underground to take. Each one leads to a different corner of the block, so choosing wrong can mean that you’re exactly opposite of where you wanted to go, & to make it worse, you can’t just ‘cross the street’ to get where you need to be. Instead, you have to go back down into the underground & guesstimate which exit is the correct one. Today, I ended up going to three (yes. 3) different exits, walking up 2 flights of stairs for each, only to find that I’d chosen…. poorly. There’s just some things you don’t know until you memorize them I guess.

My appointment was for 14:00 (2 p.m. for us ‘mericans) & I was running a little early, so I stopped at a pizza place for a slice. Turns out, ordering was simple – the majority of the staff spoke Spanish; while I’m definitely not fluent, I can have a conversation. And so I did. It was nice, & a little bit surreal to be speaking Spanish in Germany. But at least I got the right pizza. I walked across the street to Levent & Ines beautiful big Green Apartment Building, & within a couple of minutes, I was sitting at their kitchen table, watching 1 year old Samuel crawling around the room, stopping every couple seconds to try to figure out just WHO this person was in his house.

Levent & Ines were some of the first people I met when I came back to Frankfurt in March 2005 – they had just been married a year at that time. Over the years, they’ve added two kids to the family, 3 year old Saraya & the aforementioned 1 year old Samuel. The last 6 months have been very stressful on them, as Samuel has had to be hospitalized with an unknown condition that caused a lot of physical issues, including seizures. I can imagine that the strain of that, plus trying to care for another child, plus trying to work must have been overwhelming. We had great talks, & I was very blessed & honored to be able to be with them today, just a few days short of their 10th wedding anniversary.

IMG_1595After hanging out for a couple of hours, Levent needed to leave to pick up Saraya from her kindergarten, so he offered to drop me at the rendezvous point for my next meeting in Bockenheim, a region of Frankfurt I’m pretty familiar with because it is where the German church we have had relationship with, Treffpunkt Leben (TPLF) is located. (The picture to the left is the Bockenheim Tower, an old military/defensive installation set up on the edge of the city to give warning if any danger approached.) Saraya’s kindergarten is bilingual, using both German & Spanish. It was pretty cool to be able to hear the 3-6 year olds speaking both languages, sometimes in the same sentence. One of the students was a little Korean girl – couldn’t have been more than 3 years old, & she was talking to her mother, a mile a minute, in Spanish, about her music & dance class. It was precious.

IMG_1593Levent, Saraya, & I parked & walked to Leipziger Strasse so IMG_1594that they could buy a pastry, then we said our goodbyes, & I headed up the street & towards Kurfuerstenstrasse 14, where TPLF used to meet. A few years ago, the old church building was torn down, & this was built in its place.

IMG_1592I also went by to see if anyone might be at the TPLF office, but it was too late in the day, so I missed everyone. Ended up walking to the Kurfuerstenstrasse Park & sitting on one of the park benches & people watching until it was time to go meet Steve. Walked back to the Ubahn station just in time to catch him – we decided to head back to the park to talk until it was time to meet his wife, Sarah, for dinner. I had never met her (Steve was only engaged when he was in Reno, & they just celebrated their first anniversary last week.)

We had a great time catching up over the events of the last couple years since Steve visited us in Reno – the time almost got away from us. Fortunately, Sarah called & reminded us that she was on her way, so we walked back to Leipzieger Strasse to get dinner at KISH, a Persian restaurant right off of the main street with a great outdoor eating space. That the owner of the restaurant didn’t want us to sit at. He wanted us inside for some reason – didn’t catch it, but I think it had to do with the fact that it was a ‘prime table’ & we were there a little before ‘prime time’ with no reservations. Not that we needed them at that point, as there were a grand total of 5 other people at the place, & there were at least 40 open tables. He finally agreed to seat us outside, & brought us menus. The food followed quickly.

And then the rain started. It began with rolling thunder & a light sprinkle.

That lasted for about 10 minutes – we were protected from the rain by a large sun shade, so we didn’t think we had to worry about anything. Until the rain began to fall in earnest. Sideways. After a couple minutes of trying to ‘weather’ the weather, we gave up & took our food inside to an open table. And we watched the lightning show. And the rain falling, harder & harder until it seemed like the downpour rivaled the hurricane theBean & I endured in the summer of ’94. Ok, it wasn’t that bad, but I had no umbrella & I forgot my rain jacket at home. IMG_1597

We finished dinner & tea, all the while hoping for a brief respite that would allow us to walk the 1/2 mile or so to the Ubahn station. It didn’t happen, so we decided to make a run for it. By the time we hit the station, I was soaked. But it was a warm rain.

Said goodbye to the Greenhills at the main U station, & we went our separate ways. Fortunately,  I had a beautiful walk home from the station near Alex & Linda’s. I tried to be as quiet as possible so I wouldn’t wake them if they were sleeping, yet somehow in my attempt to turn off the light outside their front door, I managed to ring their doorbell, making their giant Rhodesian Ridgeback bark at the sudden noise. Smooth. Very smooth.

Alex was just finishing a workout, & Linda didn’t wake up, so my faux pas wasn’t as bad as it could have been. Took out my contacts & headed towards bed, & took a couple of minutes to catch up on emails that couldn’t wait to be dealt with until later. It was a great day.

As I think about my yesterday (Thursday) on  this fine morning (Friday, about 10:40 a.m.) I’m musing on how much has changed since I was last here almost 4 years ago. In me. In others. And it feels really good to know that in the middle of all of that, we still have something very, very important: Friendship.

Thank you for praying. Blessings to you.

 

Monday, Monday, an anniversary, hotness, & water issues…

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Remember a couple of weeks back, when we were bemoaning the fact that warm weather seemed to have overslept, & hadn’t remembered to grace northern Nevada with her lasting presence? Well, she’s here with a vengeance. It is just plain hot.

Which reminds me – last Saturday, I did a wedding on the roof of the Nevada Museum of Art at 5:30 p.m. Which meant that the temperature was about 100F…+ an additional 20 or so degrees due to being on the roof, heat magnified & held by the concrete tiles that adorn it. Oh, & I was in a black suit. Which meant that though I tried to stay in the climate controlled museum as long as possible, the 20 minutes I was out in the open on the roof I was absolutely drenched in perspiration.

As soon as I declared “Man & Wife,” I bailed… to head to 7-11 for an icy water… I was absolutely pouring sweat, & setting the A/C to ’11’ didn’t even take the edge off. Walked into 7-11 & headed for the cooler – the clerk behind the counter greeted me, “Hey! How you doin’?” I’m thinking, isn’t it obvious? I’m in a SUIT on a day that is so hot one wouldn’t even need a magnifying glass to fry bugs on the sidewalk… But, in the name of common decency, I simply replied, “I’m hot.”

To which she said, “Wow! Aren’t you sure of yourself!” I was caught off guard… she thinks I’m saying that I believe I am Hot…? Not temperature hot, but capital H Hot.

Goodness. “Uh, no. Not what I meant…” Errr…

The main water line going into the water heater in the garage broke. Again. That makes 4 times in the last month. TheBean mentioned to the plumber last time (or the time before. I forget,) that the PVC pipe piece that keeps breaking might, just might be better replaced with a metal piece. Previously, the plumbers didn’t agree with her, & insisted on using a ‘factory approved’ (read: needs to be replaced on a regular basis…) piece.

This time, the plumber agreed… & went to Home Depot to buy Copper piping material. He cut & soldered & MacGyvered the piece until such a time as the leak was repaired, & the water was returned to our home. Booyah!

Thinking about marriage. Being married. This Thursday is anniversary #21 for me & theBean. We married at 19 & 18, respectively. Thought I knew what love was. What it meant to sacrifice & love another with the whole heart. Reflecting on what I know now, the lessons learned over the last 22 years of life with the girl of my dreams. I’ve learned…

-Communication is more than speaking louder & slower.
-Eye contact is under-rated.
-Sometimes the problem is not enough sleep.
-The real issue isn’tthe toilet seat.
-She really doesn’t want me to fix her. She just wants me to listen. Who knew?
-Sharing food doesn’t hurt nearly as bad as I thought it would.
-Down-time doing ‘nothing’ is the best time there is.
-I think I understand a little bit more what it means that “love covers a multitude of sins…”
-Sitting on the porch doesn’t hurt either.
-Vino is truly a sign of God’s blessing. And enjoyed with theBean, its the best.
-Going through tough things, together, is one of life’s great joys.
-Grace is absolutely beautiful. When displayed, it shines brighter than a diamond in the sun.
-The wife of my youth makes 39 look amazing.

And we just now, this second, verbally agreed (which is binding, don’t you know) on how we’ll be celebrating our anniversary. Makes me smile to think of it: Panda Express (theBean’s favorite), a Stags Leap Petite Syrah, & candles. Lots of candles. Sigh.