heading out

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Woke up this morning to smell of breakfast – Johannes prepared some eggs all the accoutrements of a German breakfast for us today… very nice. We hung out, drank coffee, & enjoyed catching up on the last 6 months. We went for a drive to the Black Forest using the High Road – a special windy road that made me get all nauseous & long for fresh air :).

We arrived at the Aldes Gott Vineyard (Old God) & browsed the gift shop to pick up a memento for The Bean & Alex & Linda too – & made it back to J & A’s by the time Anja had to go to work. Johannes took me back to Frankfurt, a 2 hour drive. I have really missed my friend…

Alex, Linda, & I took Johnathan for a walk in the park (as fun as it sounds,) & then hung out at home to watch “The Counterfeiters”.

One of the highlights, if not THE highlight for me, has been the opportunity to share life with the Grieguszies family. To be involved, included, & accepted by such wonderful people goes beyond the words necessary to describe it. It’s been truly amazing.

I’ve got about 4 1/2 hours of potential sleep available, as I’m coming home tomorrow – taking the 8:25 flight to Washington – to Denver – to Reno… I’m planning on processing the week & trying to wrap my brain around what I’ve seen & heard.

Thanks for your prayers – its greatly appreciated. I can’t wait to get home.

Late nights

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It’s 2:33 a.m. for me, & I’m posting on a ‘borrowed’ wifi… gracias to whoever is lending it.

Drove 2 hours to Steinbach to spend time with Johannes & Anja – we first went to visit a friend, Roland Lorenz, at the church in Ottesweier – I met Roland about 2 years ago & have corresponded with him since – we prayed through his church & he asked us to bless him & his church. I truly felt honored to be with him in the place where he’s given the last 5 years of his life…

There’s a girl in Roland’s church, Julia (think: J=Y, so its Yulia) who is finishing her last exams of ‘high school’ in July – she’s 19 & will be coming to the US of A. Based on our relationship with Roland, the Bean & I were asked if she could come to Reno.

Tonight, I met with her & her parents to answer all the questions that a mother who is sending her 19 year old daughter to the US for a year would ask. Did I mention that it is her ‘baby?’ :)

We ate pizza, drank the local vintage of red (as the Steinbach/Sasbach region is a big vineyard) & talked.

As long as her visa is approved, she’ll be coming to Reno in August to stay in the “German room” at our house.

The rest of the night was spent talking, catching up, & praying together. Tomorrow we’re eating chicken curry & then Johannes will take me back to Frankfurt to Alex & Linda’s place for my last night in Deutschland for the month of Mai.

Good night – I miss you. Esp. the Bean.

10 Mai – coming to a close…

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Today was our last time together – we spent the morning in worship & in our small groups – revisiting what it is that God has most impressed on all of us this week: individually, & for each other. We went around the circle & shared, then after each of us finished, we took time to pray for & confirm what happened this week – to ‘cement it’ in our lives while it is still fresh in our memories, before the tyranny of the urgent & the routine of the commonplace return to battling for attention.

To me, what stood out is the need to listen – to really discern what’s going on in the days & times we live in, then to respond appropriately. Most significantly, I have been encouraged multiple times that words carry weight – & somebody told me that something I’d said to them in August was still ‘ringing in their ears.” That the words we speak carry life – & that I have a responsibility & a gift to encourage – to impart courage. To build up, to strengthen, to give life. Reminds me of our studies in James 3 on the power of the tongue – this point was driven home time & time again.

I’m spending the rest of the evening with Alex & Linda – we ate dinner together (ciabatta bread & veggies) & sampled some of the New Clairvaux Petite Sirah. Later, we’re heading out for a night on the town…

9 Mai, Part Deux…

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This a.m. we had a prayer time – one of the student leaders (Dudi from Frankfurt) thought it would be a God idea for all of the core team (of which I’m a part) to do nothing tonight – but that all of the student leaders to bring a ‘gift’ – a song, a psalm, a scripture, a prayer, something, that would be done for the benefit & building up of everybody there. Church.

There were prayers in Romanian; a couple of original songs (one in English, one in Japanese;) a poem; a bible verse reading; a game; 15 minute relaxation; communion shared (with bread & wine & lots of community union) a funny story by one of the most intriguing people I’ve ever heard talk – a great Finn with a booming, sweet voice.

It was amazing. A great day.

Now it is 1:15 in the a.m. so Hi Ho, Hi Ho, its off to sleepy I go.

9 Mai – lifting

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Today we experienced a great lifting of the heaviness that I (& others) have been wrestling with for the last few days – it was obviously an opponent – the accompanying hopelessness, despair, & grief (w/o hope of an end) were telltale giveaways… as was the desire to separate & isolate ourselves & to pull away from relationship. My hosts had quite a time of it today – it even affected their puppy.

I spent the afternoon with Claudius, a dear friend from TPLF – coffee & a sunny day by the shores of the Main River… Truly, this is the life. All I was missing was the Bean & it would have been perfect.

I’m late to the next Round of Roundabout, so I’ll put a comma here & try to jump back in later –
Many blessings to you
Louie

8 Mai

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We spent the day in today talking on “What is church?” in the context of two small groups, & a large group discussion. The point of all the talking wasn’t to try & come up with one, spot on definition of what church is – but rather to move beyond the idea of church being a set of programs, methods, & meeting locations – one of the ideas that I liked the best was the picture of the church being an embassy in a foreign land – complete with ambassadors…

For lunch we had pizza – which in Frankfurt usually means a very thin crust accompanied by a compilation of all kinds of things that you never thought you’d see on a pizza – like Tuna. Still, I happened to find one pizza topped by Salamiwurst & another with green & red peppers – I folded each piece 3x & then shoveled in mass quantities.

We’re just ready to eat dinner (it’s 6 p.m.) followed by worship & a ‘wrap up’ talk by Geert from Holland.

Thank you for your prayers –
Louie

What is Church?

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Tomorrow a.m. (tonight for you at 12:35 in the a.m.) I will be facilitating a discussion on the topic: What is Church? The point isn’t to describe the institution so much as the mission – or the reason it exists.

The life context of the 25 attendees is radically different – in age, cultural background, country of origin, life experience, & perspective, so I’m expecting some interesting answers to the above question.

How would you answer it? If that’s not enough to get you blogging, then:

When you think “Church” what comes to mind? Why?

Talk amongst yerselves…

7 Mai…

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I slept well, & woke up a couple of times in the night to see what time it was… only to find that I still had several hours of sleep available to me. Alex & Linda are on the 5th floor & have an incredible view from their extra large window. A double espresso & a trip on the U7 later, I arrived at TPLF for our 1st meetings with the Roundabout team.

TPLF is going through a very difficult time right now, as they have lost their pastor, a dear friend of mine (& ours) for an indefinite period of time – as I approached the building, I was overwhelmed with waves of grief… almost like a wet blanket that weighed me down & made it hard to walk. I sobbed for a period of time (I don’t know how long,) then went upstairs to the top floor. The people that make up the Roundabout core team that were able to be here are myself, Sam & Mirjam, Dan & Joy, Petra, & Geert, & We met for about 3 hours, & had a great time catching up. We talked about Roundabout, our schedule, & also how we are working through/processing our own grief & life struggles. A couple of highlights – I got to see my god-daughter, Rebecca Grace, & to hold her – she is very light, & always has the beginnings of a grin on her face. Plus, she can touch her nose with her tongue! Not bad for a 7 month old… She came to me right off (which her mum says she doesn’t normally do,) & was content for quite a while…

My belly was growling, & at 1 p.m., we made our way over to the Bistro Sahin for Doener Kebaps & mineralwasser, which is water with some light carbonation. Very nice; just like I remembered.

Sam & I talked for about 2 hours – sitting outside of the Bistro, drinking a coffee @ the “Illy”, taking a walk around the White Tower (by the U of Frankfurt) – we talked about family, marriage, church, personal calling, Sabbath & “pacing” e.g. walking vs. running through life, & also about navigating difficulties, & maintaining/cultivating integrity. I really like the opportunity to talk – & to have interchange of ideas – it reminds me that regardless of where we come from that there are many, many things that we can relate to because we’re both Christ-followers. It makes me thankful that in Christ we really have a depth & breadth of relationship that is based on values that aren’t personality or culture.

I am also very, very thankful to be a part of Hillside; & that you, my church family, are behind me & believe in & support me, not only at home, but also in coming to Frankfurt. I am so proud to be able to represent you, & to be able to know that I’m loved & am prayed for. And that Hillside is Jesus’ church, & that we’re on the way – becoming who God has shaped us to be. I’m getting teary writing this as I see your faces & think about the wonderful people that you are, & how special you are to me. I am overwhelmed with love & appreciation for you. Thank you for saying “Yes” to God’s process for your life – for being brave, filled with faith, to hear God & to obey Him, both personally, & as a church family.

Between the hours of noon & 4 p.m. are the lowest times for me – it’s the wee hours of the morning at home (we’re 9 hours ahead) so my body is screaming out for me to “obey’ & go lay down. But I resist, & stand firm, & drink lots & lots of java, hoping & praying for the time in the afternoon, usually about 5:30 p.m., when my body realizes that anywhere I am, its time to get up…

Tonight we’ll be eating dinner with all of the Roundabout participants – there’s even a couple of people from Romania… maybe I’ll break out my incredible knowledge of the Romanian language, which allows me to say a few words: Please; thank you very much; you’re welcome; I don’t understand; apple pie; French fries; two hamburgers. (Let’s just say I spent a LOT of time at McDonald’s on my trip to Oradea, Romania.) We have worship & prayer, then will take about 2 hours to get to know a bit about each other – as we describe a bit of our life ‘story’ – or what brought us to this place at this time. Then its home to Alex & Linda’s for a cold German beer & watching episodes of The Office. Dwight K. Schrute is funny in any language.

Tears are very near the surface for me – I find myself blinking them back all the time now… sometimes tears just come out, & I don’t know why.

It’s 5:30, & I’m emerging from my pseudo-slumber – I’m going downstairs to the erde-geschloss (ground floor) to mingle with the people that are arriving – you know how I love to mingle ☺.

Thank you for your prayers – & I will update as soon as I can.
Tschüss!
Louie

Tuesday…

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3 legs of a trip – Reno to Denver (2 hours) to DC (2:45) to Frankfurt (7:30). The trip to Frankfurt was uneventful – I ended up in Economy plus on an aisle, with not one (1) but two (2) empty seats next to me. The Plus part of Economy Plus = about 7 more inches of foot/leg/knee room, which just might be the greatest thing ever on a long flight.

I ended up sleeping about 5 hours, though not consecutively, as I was woken up multiple times by someone in the vicinity who was passing gas like it was a sport, & they were the Olympic champion. Truly, whoever this was could give Brother, in travel mode, a run for his money.

Alex picked me up at the airport, & we dropped off my huge bag at his & Linda’s home. It was there that I met Jonathan, their 7 month old huge puppy – I thought he was going to eat me, but instead he just licked me & has taken to removing my socks from my room on occasion.

Alex, Jonathan & I went to a Vietnamese restaurant where I ate spicy duck (psych! on the spicy part – it was white bread spicy, meaning not at all,) then we went for a walk around Kurfuerstenplaetz & Leipziger Strasse – got home a minute ago to find that Alex has wi-fi. So, the good news is I have email access 1 or 2x a day.

I’m jet lagging, but good – & it’s taking all of my spidey-sense to stay awake. Pray for me; I’ll check in soon.

juxtaposed…

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Raskalnikov

WARNING: Long Rambling Post Ahead… I’m working through a process right now – trying to clarify my thoughts, & what Jesus is saying, has said, & is pointing me towards.

The irony of knowing that there was truth in Jesus’ declaration about life in all of its fullness while not seeing/feeling/experiencing/living in that fullness led to a preoccupation… the kind that I have been told is one of the things that The Bean loves about me. It’s a preoccupation that stays on something, actively & passively, until there’s a point of resolution. She loves it, w/one exception… when the preoccupation turns gets pointed in her direction in a point of relational conflict. But I digress. (Reminds me of when Monk talks about his quirky obsessive/compulsive ‘gift’ as a blessing. And a curse. The “dark side” if you will, of a strength…)

I spent a lot of time in the Gospel of John; not just in 10:10, but all around it. I was dwelling on; meditating on; maybe even obsessing on it. Call it “focused study.” I would start with the KJV, w/the Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance with Hebrew, Aramaic, & Greek word definitions, & review each word in the passage, as every word & phrase is full of meaning & connotations. Examining context, nuances. Then I’d break out all the Bible translations in English that I had available: NASB, NRSV, NKJV, NIT, NLT, & The Message… to see how each of the translators (or paraphrasers) had chosen to word the passage.

One of the things I do as a part of studying & researching is to go through a big chunk of material (see above paragraph,) then enter “processing mode.” This is where I do something that is seemingly unrelated to what I had just been doing, but actually is a vital part of the studying/researching/writing – usually this involves cleaning or organizing something. It’s like the cleaning helps to sort through thoughts & ideas, & aids the germination of what God is speaking to me about. (I also did this while writing papers in college…) If I’m really onto something, I vacuum. The lines in the carpet are so reassuring…

Thoughts from 10:10: the thief is one who comes to take what belongs to others & to use it for their own gain or to squander it so the one that has had it, can’t use it. His purpose is 3-fold:

  • to steal – take away by stealth;
  • to kill – slaughter, kill, sacrifice
  • to destroy – render useless; remove completely; ruin; put to an end

    On the other side of that, Jesus states His purpose – the word purpose really, really is important here – it is a main reason that He came.

  • Jesus came that humanity would have – hold fast to
  • Life – vitality, absolute fullness of life
  • In all of its fullness – greater measure; more than is necessary; over & over…

    In the pondering of the word purpose, a light came on. The enemy, the thief is actively working to steal, kill, & destroy – to sabotage humanity. Jesus, who came to undo the works of the devil & more specifically, to give, that humanity would have an abundance & overflow of life… And what He gives cannot be earned. Or deserved.

    Bingo. That was me.

    Jesus died for my sins. I can receive that. He was resurrected from the dead, so I have eternal life. I’m there too. But grace for each day… hmm. that’s where I was stuck. That’s where I was toiling to be ‘worthy’ of the life that I could never earn.

    A flash of remembrance: Rich Mullins had had a dramatic influence on my life through his music, writings, & zest for life. He spoke about something that had changed his life, in how he viewed himself, something that had clarified all that he had ‘known’ about God as revealed in Jesus. It was The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning. So I bought it. And made it through 3 pages before I broke down, weeping.

    Jesus loves me. And has grace for me. Even after I became a Christian, His grace is still enough for me.

    to be continued…at some point…