Stuff #4 – “Feed the hungry bird…”

Rolling on in the series, “STUFF I’VE PICKED UP ALONG THE WAY.”  This one also came from Ron Pinkston, by way of a few dozen conversations with people on the topic of “making disciples of Christ.”


STUFF #4 – When it comes to making disciples, influencing others towards good, encouraging people: FEED THE HUNGRY BIRD.

When I started volunteering with Jr & Sr High students, I knew that one of my responsibilities was to make disciples (aka ‘fully devoted followers of Christ.’) However, I didn’t have any idea just HOW I was supposed to do that. So, pre-the Google machine’s invention, I asked around. Called friends (on a touch tone land-line phone, even,) for recommendations. Some suggested a curriculum, studied in a classroom type setting, for a set number of weeks; others offered up a ‘y’all come’ approach, where any & everyone who showed up to class &/or youth group would be discipled (though I wasn’t exactly sure how that was supposed to happen. Still.)

I fumbled & stumbled through it, feeling overwhelmed, ill-equipped, & frustrated. Felt like I was failing at what I was trying to do. And then…

“If you want to make disciples & don’t know where to start, just FEED THE HUNGRY BIRD. Look for the student that wants to learn, wants to grow, & wants to spend time doing it. And then spend time with them.”

Don’t exactly remember the context for when/where I heard this saying, but I know when I did, a light bulb went on in my head. I could do that! And so I decided to experiment: one night at youth group, I told the handful of students, “Anyone who wants to grow in their relationship with Jesus & hang out with me before school, & drink coffee/eat a muffin at the City Cafe bakery, we’re meeting on Tuesdays @ 6 a.m. I’ll get you a ride to school as well.”


The next Tuesday, I showed up at the City Cafe as the doors were opening to the public… it was me & a few morning stragglers grabbing their coffee & a quick bite on their way to work. No one was sitting in the Cafe, so I got my cup (free refills For The Win #FTW) & parked at a table in the middle aisle of the restaurant. (It was a converted, barely remodeled Swensen’s Ice-Cream parlor. If you’ve been in one, you get the picture.) I was alone.

Every time one of the doors opened, I’d peek around to see if any brave souls were joining me in at the Crack O’Doom. For coffee & Jesus. For the longest time, (at least 10 minutes,) no students came… just early risers on their way to work. And then…

I’d heard the door, but had gotten tired of turning around to the disappointment of Yet Another not-student walking in the door. I focused on drinking my bottomless cup of joe, nibbling on a cobblestone muffin, & reading my Psalms.

Next thing I knew, I sensed someone’s presence nearby. It was Vic, a 7th grader from our youth group, standing there looking as awkward as I felt, & but as welcome as any Christmas morning I’d ever experienced. Somebody came! And now what to do.

Vic figured out the transactional part of the morning (coffee & a muffin for here in the cool green basket,) & came over & sat across from me. Drinking his coffee, slowly. Taking large bites of his muffin.

What to do next? He was here now, invited to come “grow in his relationship with Jesus.”


So we talked. Laughed. I listened to him, & prayed that I’d have something to say. His questions didn’t start on Jesus, the Bible or other spiritual topics, but somehow, they seemed to end up there.

Before I knew it, an hour had passed & it was time to take him to school – when I dropped him off, I can remember him saying, “So, we gonna do this again next week?”

I hadn’t thought of next week. But I said, “Yes. Of course. Same time, same place.” And he got a big smile on his face & said something like, “Cool. it was fun.” And he bailed.


Over that school year (& for the next several years that I lived in Carson City,) Tuesdays at the City Cafe became a ‘thing,’ at one point taking over most of the tables & booths in the restaurant. All Jr & Sr High students. All ordering coffee. All eating a muffin. All talking at their tables with friends, Youth sponsors (people there to help me with supervision & discipleship) & having a blast.

Being discipled. Encouraged towards Jesus. It was beautiful, & is still one of my favorite memories from my time in Carson.


Over the years, FEED THE HUNGRY BIRD came to mean – share time, space, & experiences with the people who WANT to gather, WANT to hang out, WANT to learn. Though it could sound trite, it really was true: the Holy Spirit set the agenda for what got addressed, & we never really needed a curriculum as He & life’s circumstances & challenges provided more materials than I could ever have wanted to have.

There’s no substitute for time together. For good conversation. For making time to listen. For saying, “I don’t know,” when you don’t know, & for heading to prayer for answers, comfort, & encouragement in those times.

It gives me great joy to know that many, many of those students are still walking with Jesus, now with spouses & their own kids (& some even have grandkids) more than 30 years later.

And it all started with Vic, the brave soul who took me up on my invite to grow in his relationship with Jesus. Over coffee. With a muffin. Before Jr High.

Stuff #3… “Nobody owes me anything.”

This is #3 in a blog mini-series about “Stuff I’ve picked up along the way.” You can find the other 2 parts of this HERE

STUFF #3 – NOBODY OWES ME ANYTHING. (This one came up a couple of times; first, in a series of conversations with a former pastoral overseer/supervisor of mine, Ron Pinkston, & then later with Jerry Cook.)

Think about that phrase for a second.

It’s not “I don’t owe anyone anything,” (which I know might sound suuuuuper attractive to you. I recognize that it could be a very enticing potential life motto, especially when one is feeling stretched super-thin {like too little butter spread over too much toast} &/or is feeling extra “done” from pouring out. Nope.)

This one is not THAT. It, very specifically & intentionally, is “Nobody owes me anything.”


Time is funny, in that I can’t remember all the specifics that were going on in my life at the time, nor exactly what prompted me to seek out the conversation w/Ron. (Granted – this may have been 25 years ago.)  I do remember that I was frustrated, I felt wronged, & I really, truly thought that when I talked to my supervisor, he would fully understand, he would reassure me in my feeling of ‘wrongness’ & perhaps even commiserate with me a bit about the VERY obvious series of wrongs that I was experiencing. I was right about one thing; he DID understand. Except…

He understood what I was saying to him better than I understood it myself. In my mind, I was relaying to him one of the great hurts that happen to People Like Me in this life; people who are givers who then, in their own point of need, are not considered, taken for granted, & perhaps even… forgotten. But what he understood was that what I was expressing to him was disappointment & frustration at being let down by a couple of people who Should Have Known Better & Done Better in their interactions with me. And what I was sharing with him was born out of entitlement, selfishness, & self-pity.

I’m thankful he didn’t drop the proverbial hammer on me… nope. He merely interrupted my eloquent complaints & said something like, “I get it. I GET it. I know what the problem is… You’re living, functioning, & interacting with these people (& probably more) with a belief that because of who you are & what you do, that somehow they OWE you in some way. And you just can’t believe that they’re NOT responding towards you in the way you want.”

Ever have one of those moments when a trusted friend shares some tough words with you & as you hear them, you also hear & feel the conviction of the Holy Spirit reinforcing what they’re saying? This was THAT. I knew he was right. And I knew enough to shut up & listen instead of attempting to justify myself & explain away the insights he’s just exposed. I’m thankful for his input & correction – it didn’t come from a place “on high” & unrelatable; no, it came from his own experiences. And he shared those with me – how he had been EXACTLY where I was, thinking on the same thing, wondering how & why he deserved to be so wronged…

One thing he said really stood out – “If you live your life, doing what you do, in such a way that you’re believing what you’re doing entitles you to some sort of acknowledgment or reciprocation from these people, you’re going to be in increasingly BIGGER trouble as time goes by. It’s a subtle trap of the enemy of our souls – where he invites us to look at the way we live as a part of a cosmic quid pro quo… it robs us of the joy of serving others, caring for & laying down our lives for others, & it runs the risk of poisoning our hearts & minds with bitterness & resentment. It’s ugly & it’s proud, & it will consume you if you let it. Remember, nobody OWES you anything, Louie.”

As I remember, we took a minute to pray about it & I repented – asked God’s forgiveness for the entitlement, selfishness, &  pride that motivated it. And coming out the other side of the conversation, I felt 100x lighter. And free-er.


Over the years, I’ve felt the familiar feeling/temptation to go down the road of selfish entitlement more than a few times… but I can say in good conscience that I’ve avoided it like the plague. And to me, “nobody owes me anything,” has become an invitation to acknowledge my own brokenness, while at the same time intentionally choosing to be kind, compassionate, & intentional about giving of myself to & for others.

And I’m thankful for that.

“You’ve already got it.” Stuff I’ve picked up along the way… #2

I started a blog ‘mini-series’ addressing wise sayings, cool nuggets, & good stuff that I’ve picked up along the way. (You know. Like from paying attention while living.:) Wrote a bit about this last week HERE. Check it out if you’re interested.) FWIW, this one is also a “Jerry Cook” special.

STUFF #2 – YOU DON’T NEED TO ASK GOD FOR SOMETHING HE’S ALREADY GIVEN TO YOU; INSTEAD, JUST THANK HIM FOR IT.

In 2010, I was selected to serve on one of our denomination’s governing bodies; one of the main responsibilities was to help choose the candidates for our denomination’s president. There were lots of unknowns & I was nervous – & so I decided to ask a couple people to pray for me during my time on the committee. To make it easier, I even put together a ‘bullet point’ list of prayer requests & things I was sure that I needed. WISDOM. I especially asked for wisdom for each & every new situation I’d be tackling.  Sent it out to a handful of people & got a few responses encouraging me & letting me know that they would, indeed, be praying for me.

And then I heard from Jerry.

(Let me just preface his reply by saying how much I loved how he would say/write things in a way that were full of humor, insight, & truth… even the things that were teaching or correcting moments. Even (especially?) when it was a pointed correction, you felt good getting it from him because you just KNEW the spirit in which it was offered up.)

Jerry wrote: “Nope. I’m not going to be praying for you for wisdom. And here’s why: you ALREADY HAVE IT. According to God’s Word & the promises He gives us, you already have wisdom. You’ve got so much wisdom, you’re FULL of it. So, instead of asking God to give you what He’s already given to you, THANK Him for it. And then go forward in your meetings, into every situation knowing that you have God’s wisdom & the mind of Christ.”


My initial reaction was, “He said NO? He wouldn’t pray for me?” Then after reading & rereading the note, my disbelief turned to laughter… & I got what he was saying. Later on when we had some time to talk in person, I asked him about the situation & he elaborated a bit more. He kindly shared his own “take” & “approach” to dealing with the responsibilities in front of him… & the vast majority of the time, he said he just “filled his mouth with praise & thanksgiving for the every spiritual blessing given to him by God in Christ…” And then he “acted like he HAD it already. Because God said he did.” 


That interaction continues to shape me & my life in so many ways… just about every week there’s at least one instance where I catch myself starting to pray, to ask God about something… & it turns to a “Thank you for giving me this, in Christ Jesus.” I don’t see it as wishful thinking or a ‘fake it til you make it’ type of situation. Instead, I see it as repentant thinking or as intentionally aligning my own thoughts & ways with God’s… & trusting that He’ll direct my steps, my thoughts, my words, my choices. And if I still don’t know what to do or say, after all that, I reflect on STUFF #1 – IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO OR SAY, LIMIT YOUR ACTIONS &/OR YOUR WORDS.

 

Stuff I’ve picked up along the way… #1

In the course of the last 51 years of my life, there’s a lot of helpful ‘stuff that I’ve picked up along the way’ that informs most (if not all) of the decisions, priorities, values, & other things that help make me, me. On top of that, I can guarantee you that 99.9% of the time I’ve given out good, wise, helpful, &/or encouraging advice to a friend who has asked for it, that information has come from (at least one) other source(s), & didn’t originate with me. (Ever heard the saying, “There is nothing new under the sun,” ? It comes from the Bible book of Ecclesiastes &, among other things, it speaks to the fact that wisdom, truth, insight, knowledge, etc has been around for years & was thought of (& shared) by others. This fact reminds us of many things, including:

  • no one person has a corner on wisdom, truth, insight, etc
  • we can ALL learn from many others’ experiences, insights, & perspectives
  • a person can sound SUPER smart & insightful simply by sharing things that they’ve been humble & teachable enough to learn from others…

I’ve picked up a lot of stuff over the years & I am thankful to each person who has (knowingly or unknowingly) contributed to my knowledge/experience bank. I thought it might be fun over the next several blogs to share some of that ‘stuff’ in the hopes that it can be a help to you also at some point. No pressure. It’s not like I want to be a guru or a person’s sole point of input or advice-for-life… I do, however, want to pass on that which I have found to be personally helpful – to share the stuff that I’ve accumulated in my proverbial back-pack of life experiences.


STUFF #1 – IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO OR SAY, LIMIT YOUR ACTIONS &/OR YOUR WORDS.

If you don’t know what to do or say, limit your actions &/or your words.” – Jerry Cook

This one has come in handy countless times… I know it’s not just me that feels the pressure to ACT, to RESPOND, to DO something (anything?) in a particular situation they’re facing.  Inactivity makes one feel powerless, impotent, & ineffective, & this is especially true when one functions in the role of ‘leader’ (in whatever capacity). In that space, others often look to you like you’re SUPPOSED to know what to do when the stuff hits the proverbial fan… like somehow there HAS to be some response, something that MUST be done, & somehow YOU know what it is.

But sometimes you don’t (or at least I don’t.) And that is 100% ok.

After hearing Jerry share this gem, I felt free & liberated from chains that I’d had no idea I didn’t have to carry around with me. In talking to him about it more in-depth, he said something along these lines:

“I’m living & functioning from the premise that the Holy Spirit will speak to me to direct me towards the actions & words that need to be undertaken in a particular situation. And if He doesn’t give me anything, I’m going to trust that means that I’m to limit my actions & words UNTIL He does. Jesus ONLY did what He saw/heard His Father in heaven doing. He’s our Father too, & He & the Spirit will lead us & guide us in godly responses, IF & WHEN they’re warranted for the situation at hand.”


I have embraced this truth myself for my life & areas I lead – & instead of giving in to the pressure to attempt to manufacture words/activities out of my own head & heart, I trust that the Holy Spirit WILL definitely direct me in the moment to the words & actions I’m to take.

For what it’s worth.

 

 

Highways & bulls-eyes…

I’m very thankful that I am (& have been) surrounded by a whole bunch of people who’ve been gracious enough to share some of the lessons they’ve learned along the way of life… esp. those lessons that tie in with a relationship with Christ. The list of helpful insights, tips, asides, & anecdotes that I’ve (inadvertently) collected over the years is vast, as are the sources for said info.

One of the most valuable pieces of encouragement that I reference at least 3 or 4 times a week is the advice I was given about KNOWING & LIVING IN God’s will & purpose for me – there are myriad sources with many opinions on what this looks like & feels like, lived out, but for me, the best advice I’ve ever gotten was simple, easy to understand, & even easier to apply. And it came from Jerry. (Of course it did.)


During a trying & demanding time of life (at least it seemed so at the time; the events of the last 12 months have made that time look… inviting.), I reached out to Jerry & asked him about a choice that I had in front of me; a choice that had the potential to take me & the family on a significant change of direction. I’d wrestled with the decision for quite a while before reaching out to him, mostly out of desperation & a strong desire not to mess my family (& ME) up.

He told me something like this: “Louie, you’re overthinking this – you’re assuming that God is trying to make it difficult to KNOW His will; difficult to FIND His will; difficult to FOLLOW His will, like it is some sort of bulls-eye that you can only hit if everything aligns perfectly, if you’ve prayed & read enough, etc… THAT is not how our God deals with us, His dearly loved children.”

“No, I see God’s will as a highway, complete with the rumble strips that line the highway to keep us from going off the road. First, I commit my ways to the Lord. Second, I examine myself & my life to see if my direction is taking me somewhere ILLEGAL, IMMORAL, or UNBIBLICAL. And if it is not (& it rarely would be,) I give it a shot, I press ‘Go” on the gas & start moving. Then, I trust that if I’m off, the Holy Spirit will intervene just as simply as the rumble strips sounding off with a jarring noise when your car drifts out of its lane. Its clear. Its evident. And its simple. God loves His kids, & He delights in giving them freedom to choose what they’d like to do & give themselves to, within the parameters He lays out in His word. You can trust that God, the Holy Spirit, will definitely let you know if you’re headed off road. God trusts you & His Spirit in you to make good decisions to LIVE & to bring GLORY to Him in WHATEVER you do. So go do it. And listen for the rumble strips.”

Those words set me free, lifted the anxiety & worry of ‘missing’ God’s will & purposes for my life, & also gave me confidence that I CAN & WILL hear the voice of the Holy Spirit if/when I’m ‘off-roading’.

And He always has – it was never a bulls eye to try & hit with all my effort & skill; it was a highway, wide open & ready to be driven.

Happy birthday Johnny! Some musings on his #48 & other stuff…

This picture of my brothers & me is precious to me. Not exactly sure WHEN it was taken (is there a date on it, Mom?) but using the info I have & the general ages of the 4 of us  I’m guessing it would have been approximately 1986, making me 17ish, Johnny 13ish, Joel 9ish, & Ben 5. “Why were we wrestling?,” you might ask… & I’d say, “Because we COULD.” And wrestle we did. Play-fight. Battle Royale, early WWF style. Me against the 3 of them, as it seemed to them that the logic made perfect sense. I was the oldest, & therefore the brothers deemed a 3 to 1 advantage in their favor to be a Just & Perfectly Fair match. No one really got hurt in these battles, although charley horses, head butts, & the  bloody noses were the occasional scars & battle wounds that resulted from our time together. (FACT: only person to ever give me a bloody nose besides theBean – I’ll tell that story another time – was my brother Johnny. And he did it with great joy at least 3 times that I remember, each time being such a fortunate accident. Looking back, it cracks me up – from a young age he knew that it was always easier to ask forgiveness than permission. “I’m sorry I kneed you in the face twice, Louie. Please forgive me.” Seriously?


Today marks Johnny’s 48th birthday; it is the 31st (!) birthday of his that our family has marked since he went to heaven on Father’s Day 1990. As I sit at my desk right now, I’ve been listening to a Spotify playlist with a bunch of songs that remind me of my brother. There’s a bunch of them… because he was the Original Master MixTape Maker. A big chunk of the memories that I have of him in his Jr. High years are sitting in my room (his was next to mine) with a big BOOM box w/dual cassette player & a CD player too. Made mixing his tapes a little simpler, for sure, & he was always sure to include a hand-written playlist of the songs. What a great insight into the music & words that moved him, that stuck in his head.

Nothing like a song (or a smell for that matter) to take you back to a previous time & place.


Didn’t really know the depth & breadth of the hole left behind by Johnny’s death at 17…

Sure I knew all of us WOULD (parents, brothers, family, friends, etc…) KNOW & FEEL it, but it got really real when my kids started getting older & asking questions about family, life, & WHY things are the way they are. Things like –

  • …why couldn’t they meet ALL their uncles? They’ve often said that it wasn’t fair or right. (I’d have to agree, but life isn’t often fair…)
  • …when they wondered WHY they didn’t have any cousins near their ages. And they grieved that loss, the loss of what could have been.
  • …when they didn’t understand why their dad cried at their sporting events, because their intensity, approach, mindset, & body language reminded him of his brother.

As each of them became adults & had their own kids, it has come full circle. I think they get it more now than at any time before. Might just be my own wishful thinking, but I think they understand a little bit more about what they missed out on growing up at least 10-12 years older than the rest of their cousins.

They see it every time their kids (our grandkids) play together; every time their kids ask for their best friends(their cousins) to come over & play; every time at all-family get togethers when everythings-as-it-should-be & it’s beautiful, wonderful, & heavenly… & yet someone is still missing…


It’s funny, but during the last 10 months of the pandemic, I’ve thought about Johnny even more than ever. About his faith in Christ, his love for God’s Word, his ‘big-picture’ life-perspective on what is ‘worth’ doing (caring for others, offering & asking for forgiveness, playing hard & often, turning the music up to ’11’ among other stuff,) & what ISN’T worth doing (holding grudges, indulging ego, petty fights & nitpicking, compromising values & personhood to fit in, etc…)

He was my ‘little’/younger brother, but the way he lived in & through the moments of trial, trouble, physical & health challenges – I really looked up to him & his example in those things. We were best friends for most of our lives, but especially as he hit 12 & his early teens. We spent so much time together (commiserating over chores, folding & delivering newspapers, participating &/or watching sporting events, talking before going to sleep at night, all of it.) There’s still a hole there.


And yet… Today, I am thankful more than ever for my brothers, Joel & Ben – the men that they have become is really quite impressive. Their character, work ethic, devotion to their families… hardly a week goes by that I’m not referencing one or both of them, bragging on them from afar to whatever poor sucker happens to be in a conversation with me that happened to trigger a thought about those guys. I’m so proud of them & I treasure them & their friendship… & I know Johnny would have as well. No malark.

Happy birthday Johnny – miss you terribly.

 

Some thoughts on (Exodus) 20:7 & other musings…

One of the earliest Sunday school lessons (that I remember) that stuck out to me was the lesson (series of lessons?) on the 10 Commandments. Now, I know that there are more than 10 commandments; to be precise, there are actually 613 commandments, both “do’s” & “don’ts” in the Law of Moses, aka the Torah. But all of the commandments are kicked off with “the 10” in Exodus 20, & for reals, 10 is an easier number to remember than 613. And, since we’re on the topic – Jesus narrowed it down to 2, which is even SIMPLER to remember than 10. As a firstborn, I am generally partial to lists & rules, so I really paid attention that particular week. I ‘learned’ the commandments & over the years I have tried to internalize not just the letter of those commands but also the spirit of them (Jesus goes into more detail on that with His “You’ve heard it said… but I say to you…” scriptures. If you click on that link, it will at least give you an understanding of what I’m talking about.)


Like many of you, I’ve been pondering the events in our nation’s capital last week (here’s a sneak peak just in case you’ve been out of touch or out of town, both of which I was last week. Ah, Lake Tahoe, miss you much). There’s a whole lot to think about… & one of the things that is repeatedly coming to mind are the depictions of people “storming the Capitol building” while holding signs that identified their actions as being associated with being followers of Jesus & acting in His Name. Reminded me of the 3rd commandment (you knew I’d eventually get back to the 10 commandments.)

“You shall not take the Name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes His Name in vain. – Exodus 20:7 – English Standard Version

Looking back, my parents did a phenomenal job of helping me to learn about & live out our faith; not just the facts of it, but the spirit behind it as well. And, I sure learned the 10 commandments. I can recall several conversations that we had on what it meant to take the Lord’s Name in vain. It meant:

  • Using the Name as an exclamation or a ‘replacement’ swear word;
  • Speaking/writing the Name in a casual, common, derogatory, or irreverent manner;
  • Avoiding words & phrases that were close to taking the Name in vain (&/or that were euphemisms for it. Stuff like “gosh, golly, god, etc…” You get the picture.

For us it WASN’T about a list of ‘approved &/or rejected’ good/bad words; it WAS about honoring God & treating the Name with the respect & honor it deserves. (FWIW: There’s a whole bunch of scripture on the Name of God & the Name of Jesus… For example, my brothers & I knew that the Name was never to be used in a cavalier, disrespectful, or common manner because of the significance of the Name – the only Name under heaven given for people to be saved; the power of the Name -power to save, heal, transform, & protect; & the authority of the Name – one day every knee will bow & tongue confess the Name.)


A few things that keep surfacing in my head/heart – for me/others to:

  • Live & act & declare the Name of Jesus in a way that does NOT reflect the heart, character, & nature of Jesus Christ = taking His Name in vain.
  • Apply Jesus’ Name selectively & incongruently to my causes, my beliefs, my politics = taking His Name in vain.
  • Use Jesus’ Name to endorse political, economic, &/or military campaigns = taking His Name in vain.
  • Use the Name of Jesus as endorsement of a course of action I am undertaking in an  attempt to add significance, weight, &/or legitimacy = taking His Name in vain.

I know this isn’t an exhaustive list of what it means to take His Name in vain, but they are 4 types of ways that we DO it, to the detriment & discredit of our witness as believers in Christ. I don’t have all the answers & I know I’ve got a 2×4 in my own eye, so long before I go looking to try & get the sawdust out of ANYONE else’s eye, I’m asking that the Holy Spirit would go to work & address the junk in me. 


So what am I supposed to do if/when I want to show Jesus is alive, active, & real in my life? Here’s a few ideas:

  • Love God with all of my heart, soul, mind, & strength. Mark 12:29-31
  • Love my neighbors. Mark 12:29-31
  • Be kind/show kindness (love in action) to all. Ephesians 4:31,32
  • Do to/for others what I’d want them to do to/for me. Matthew 7:12
  • Be quick to listen, slow to speak, & slow to become angry. James 1:19
  • To the best of my ability live at peace with all people.
  • Only speak that which is helpful, encouraging, life-giving, & builds others up. Ephesians 4:29

In & around these (& other) Scriptures, there is also a TON of instruction on getting rid of/taking off the the junk in my life: the anger, the language, the attitudes, the behaviors, the spite, the hatred, etc… & putting on the New/putting on Christ – that which reflects Him & His Nature.

Feels like there is a lot of repenting, reflecting, & soul-searching ahead… & that is a good thing. Allowing my actions to speak & letting my words be few… that is too.

 

Here’s to the New (Things)…

TheBean & I get to spend the first couple of days of what would normally be the “First Work Week of 2021” at one of our favorite places in the whole world: a small cabin on the shores of Lake Tahoe. It’s (thankfully) on the Nevada side of the lake, albeit just a couple of miles from South Lake (& Califor-kneee-yaaaah). We’ve been very fortunate to be able to come to this place over the years for several reasons:

  • It’s Lake Tahoe. C’mon man. This has got to be one of the most beautiful places in the whole world. I’ve not been EVERYWHERE, but over the years I have been places. Hawaii (Kauai & Maui). Italy. Switzerland. Germany. France. England. Poland. Mexico. Cana-dia. Been very blessed to see & stay in many beautiful locations, & hands-down, Lake Tahoe is the best.
  • It’s close. We can get from our front door to the cabin’s front door in < 60 minutes. Fully unloaded & ready to “BE” in < 90. It’s good.
  • It’s a rental. No day-to-day cost for maintenance & upkeep, let alone taxes. The cost of real estate in Reno/Sparks has gone through the roof, & Lake Tahoe is waaaaay beyond that. Coming to these cabins over the years has been a (relatively) simple & inexpensive way to do mini-vacations, with just the two of us & with all the kids/grandkids.
  • Off-season discount.  Coming to the cabins has been doable over the years because of an ‘off-season’ (Labor Day to Memorial Day) discount offered to clergy. It’s made places accessible that would have been WAAAY beyond the norm.

They say that all good things must come to an end. (Who is ‘they’? I’m immediately flashing back to my youth. I can still hear “Dandy” Don Meredith singing, 3-sheets to the wind, in the Monday Night Football booth, Turn out the lights/the party’s over/They say that all/good things must end…) We just discovered when we were attempting to sign up for our post-Labor Day cabin time that they off-season discount is one of the casualties of 2020 & will not be available going forward into 2021 & beyond. Bummer.

So… we’re taking a little extra time to soak in the time we have together here. To enjoy the beauty of the waves crashing & the wind howling in anticipation of the afternoon snow flurries. This has been a good place for us to BE. To learn (in the middle stage of life) what it means to recreate. To reconnect with each other. To stop. To rest. To celebrate. To reflect.


And still. I find myself wondering… Looking forward with anticipation… Here’s why:

There are a couple of points of inspiration, words of encouragement (WOE’s) really, that we’ve gotten in the last 3 months(& BOY have we needed those.) These 2 separate but related WOE’s state:

  1. Revelation 21:5 – Jesus is making ALL THINGS new. This is the theme that our mother-church organization is declaring for 2021, & I am holding on to it. Coming out of 2020, there are many things on my list that I would LOVE for Him to make new… but it’s not like I just submit a ‘wish-list’ to God & expect Him to cater to my wants & whims… His ways are much better & far more creative than my ways, which leads me to believe that the promise to make all things new is one that extends to me & theBean’s getaways. To our vacation, relaxation, reconnection, recharging, & reflection times. And that Jesus has something(s) in mind that will be New for us in these areas too. Even if we don’t see them yet.
  2. Completely separate from (but Oh So Related to) that WOE was a WOE that I received in my early morning coffee & Bible reading/pondering time. I was making my way through the Book of Isaiah (he’s a major prophet with most likely the greatest number of prophetic & insightful promises about the Messiah, the Christ, the Anointed One’s coming.) Anyways, it’s Isaiah 43:16-21 – God is doing a NEW thing. “NEW” here refers to 2 things: NEW as in unused, untouched, completely restored & whole kind of way; & NEW as in unprecedented, not seen before, groundbreaking. BOTH kinds of NEW spoken of here are encouraging, but the 2nd, the ‘unprecedented’ new… that requires just storing these things in your heart, watching & waiting & looking to SEE what God is up to. Because if it is unprecedented in our experience, we wouldn’t be able to anticipate it coming anyway.

Here’s to 2021. To the new. To the restored. To the unprecedented. To God’s blessings, old & new. To faithfulness, consistency, & connection with others. To living for more than just ME & MINE, & to being a tangible blessing in as many ways as possible to those that God chooses to bring into our path.

Reflect, repent, & resolve: 2020 edition…

It’s the last Monday of the year 2020, a year that in many ways shall go down in infamy for the sheer depth & breadth of calamity, change, & chaos it brought with it (all C’s. Didn’t mean to do that. But it works.) As the year draws to a close, I will be taking some time over the next 4 days to REFLECT & RESOLVE. Here’s what I mean.

While I’m not a fan of making New Year’s Resolutions, I am a BIG fan of LIVING:

  • Faithfully (in a way that reflects Jesus Christ & His Lordship in my life & my dedication to be the best husband I can be to my Bean)
  • On-purpose (vs. haphazardly, randomly, being blown hither & yon)
  • A principled life (according to my values & priorities)
  • An examined life (aka, a life that is reviewed, evaluated, & reflected upon with the intent of making adjustments to patterns of life to better align with the above goals)

So, how can I make sure I’m staying on target with my life? By embracing reflection & repentance. In a nutshell, for me, reflection offers the opportunity to examine what I’ve been doing & how I’ve been going about it; it assumes a posture of teachability, flexibility, & desire for growth; it reminds me that I’m a work in progress & that there are many areas of life where I desperately need God’s grace, transformation, & healing. So where does repentance come in? I’m glad you asked…

Repentance, to me, is the practice of making changes in how I think, act, & process; guided by the Holy Spirit, repentance allows for subtle (or HUGE!) adjustments to be made to “be moving towards”  God’s ways of thinking, acting, & processing. Repentance recognizes that I am not an island unto myself, nor am I the source of my own motivations, goals, & dreams. I have a Maker & I want to line up my life (& all that goes with that) with Him.


POINT OF ORDER: By the way, I don’t view God’s will as some sort of “BULLSEYE” on a target that only the few Mother Teresa-type folks on the planet can even begin to approach hitting. I believe God’s Will is more like a highway. I can choose to drive on just about any highway I can get ol’ Eugene to drive on (Eugene is my vehicle. He’s a 2001 Land Rover Discovery 2 with most of his good days behind him. He still has some of his mojo left, however. But I digress).

If I’m cruising on a highway somewhere & start to drift out of my land & towards the shoulder, what happens? Yes. You made the rumble sound by flapping your lips together. The rumble strips on the side of the highway alert me that I am getting off track & usually it just takes a minor correction to get back in the lane.

That is how I view repentance, the leading of the Holy Spirit, & God’s Will. I believe quite a bit of life is up to our choosing – what do we WANT to do? Is it biblical, ethical, & legal? Yes? Then do it, to the glory of God. When I get off track, the Holy Spirit functions, without fail, like a ‘divine rumble strip’ to alert me that I’ve gotten off track & need to make adjustments. So God’s Will isn’t so much a destination or a point of arrival, its a way-of-life & a process.


With REFLECTION & REPENTANCE comes RESOLVE. (Yes, I know that I said I’m not a fan of New Year’s Resolutions. I am not going back on that statement. I do believe that I can have – need to have – resolve to make the appropriate adjustments in thoughts, words, actions, etc. to hit the targets I am aiming for. Think about resolve like this: it’s an on-purpose decision, a determination to DO something (or a bunch of somethings). For me, these are usually long-term, life-long decisions that get tweaked, revisited, &/or reaffirmed. The fact that this process just so happens to fall at a time the calendar year is shifting to a New Year is serendipitous & wonderful, as well as a cool way to participate in a natural rhythm of life’s changes.

I don’t know all that will be adjusted at this point (I still have 4 days to dig into this,) but here’s a couple:

I want to:

  • write more (in my journal, blogs, articles, opinions, & of course, work on developing – finishing? – some book ideas);
  • read more, esp. books on history & baseball;
  • play my guitar more often & return to song-writing
  • cook more often & master a couple new beef dishes

I want to stop:

  • procrastinating on projects at home
  • responding to people in frustration & impatience
  • being negative & critical of self (& others, but mostly self)

What do you do? In what areas of your life do reflection, repentance, & resolve show up? Any things you’re looking to DO/STOP DOING in 2021?

 

Wrestling with the (internal) governor on a Monday…

Years ago, (I’m guessing 1995, but I can’t be too sure,) my friend Jason & I drove a rental truck from a company that shall remain unnamed from Reno to LA as he & the BigWeez (his wife, aka Alyse Caroline, beloved namesake of our daughter, Weez, aka Alyse Elizabeth,) prepared to relocate to go to Bible College. We weren’t far out of town when we realized that our truck had a governor, aka “Speed Limiter” on it. Which meant that as soon as we hit 56 mph, there was a tangible realization  of ‘THIS IS AS FAST AS YOU CAN GO’ that made a 9 hour trek into a 12-14 hour odyssey. Nothing could be done to GO FASTER. Trust me. We tried, especially coming down the hill from Lee Vining into Bishop.

We weren’t trying to break the sound barrier nor the “Reno to LA” land speed record. We merely wanted to navigate the 395S between Bishop & Ridgecrest at a more pleasant speed.  (70 would’ve been a dream.) By Big Pine, we were both sure: We hates the governor. Not our friend. Now or ever. (And, BTW, this isn’t a political post vaguely disparaging the governor of the great state of                          . (The blank is there for you to fill in with the name of whatever place you reside. Or that you wish you resided in. But I digress.) The governor of that truck was revealed to be the enemy of our souls, though we hadn’t known it up til that moment.

So, how does that fit into today? I’m glad you asked.


Last Thursday, I had my monthly Spiritual Direction appointment. (Click on the link to find out more about what SD is. It would be a blog in itself if I tried to explain it.) Anyway, one of the things that came up as I answered my friend’s questions (there’s a LOT of good questions in SD,) was the presence of a governor near (but NOT within) my own heart & soul, so close & so seemingly imbedded in my consciousness that apart from the holy floodlight that the Holy Spirit often seems to be in my life, I would never have noticed or paid attention to. This governor‘s job? To engage with & evaluate my thoughts, reflections, words, etc… to measure whether or not they should see the light of day.

Before you start thinking that this governor near my soul was a good thing or a welcome component in my daily life & processings, let me tell you: it is not, & here’s why: This governor, in the name/vein of “Quality Control,” has served as an almost invisible, undetected filter… & instead of being the kind of filter that I’d associate with helpful & heaven-sent (aka the Holy Spirit, 3rd person of the Trinity,) this filter seems to have been instituted at some point for the purpose of evaluating & rejecting my creative hopes & dreams thoughts & words… to the point that I didn’t even recognize that the creative flow had been reduced to… next to nothing. Barely a trickle.

Initially, I realized I had come to see the Quality Control (hereto after QC) filter as a welcome & needed part of my life… It was only in reflection during my appointment & in the hours afterward that I’ve come to realize what the QC did was to shut me down, to keep the flow of life, new ideas, new possibilities & hopes for new things to a minimum, because the QC said they weren’t good enough. They didn’t measure up. They needed to be discarded, often before they even had the first chance to form, congeal, & gain any traction or momentum.


Haven’t done much with that this weekend, but I decided to take an hour today to think on the QC & its role in my life while I was doing some work that didn’t require my full attention (vacuuming #FTW).

What I’ve decided is: I don’t want that kind of governor in my life. I don’t want a Quality Control element regulating my soul, my thoughts, & my dreams, evaluating (& rejecting!) them without them even getting a cursory twice-over.

So, I’m asking the BEST governor, the indwelling Holy Spirit, to do some heart & soul surgery on me… to remove the QC & all of its tendrils, no matter where they’ve managed to wrangle their ways into my life. I’m intentionally slowing some of my thinking/planning/preparing processes down to make room for some changes. And, I’m challenging any & all outright rejections of ideas & the like, taking some extra time, energy, & resource for the purpose of making sure that what is getting tossed out is really stuff that needs to get tossed, & not merely stuff that the enemy of my soul, no matter how benign he seemed to be all these years, has conditioned my “evaluator” to function.

Don’t know where this goes or where it ends up – I can bet, though, that it is going to be interesting & maybe even a bit unpredictable.

2021 – never too late for the New.