Ringing it in…

What does that mean? To “Ring in” the New Year? Does one need a bell to “Ring it in?” Hmm.

Reminds me of a time, two or ten that I spent “praying in” the New Year – the splanation being that it was a great way to start the year off. Perhaps, but it always felt contrived & forced to make the prayer happen, esp. if/when it required getting others to shut up from their deep ‘meaning of life’ conversations that they were having, & making them stop their games, loud happy interactions in order to join the somber prayer group (usually a circle) that would take turns trying to out “our Father,” each other. I tried so hard to make God happy… & to do what I thought a good Christian should do…

Looking back, I have regrets – I know that everyone does, but mine usually center on:

  • -things I’ve done that kept me at a distance from really knowing God, & from being myself
  • -things I’ve done, regardless of how well meaning I was, that ended up putting blockades between people being able to see Jesus as He is, replacing Him instead with religious verbiage, activities, & the like… I work hard & try intentionally not to do that…
  • -my relationship with my family – esp. my brother Moe – my talking too much, listening too little, & trying to make life & relationships fit into nice boxes. That one keeps me awake at night.
  • -pain caused to the Bean because of my desire (need? control issues?) to work my way into peace…

    I pray for the redemption of relationship with Moe – & that those that I violated, tripped up, put an obstacle course in front of would find their way through all the junk to the Real Thing that is the Word.